This is a compilation of three stories I told on Facebook’s Dad Jokes Australia Page.
1. Got my son real good. He was talking about his maths exams and how he had not prepared for it. He had to calculate the surface area of a cube. So he guessed the method and was confident he got it right, Next he had to calculate the surface area of a shaded part of a trapezium. I waited until he finished describing the method he used, once again he guessed the method. Then I pounced….
I asked if the trapezium had wings
He said “Dad, don’t you dare complete that thought…”
Of course I ignored him.
“Because that would be a flying trapezium.”
“OMG Dad, that’s terrible.”
But wait, there’s more….
“And since you took a risk on the question” I continued,
“Dad, I swear I will jump out of this car and roll roll roll”
“Would that make you a daring young man on the flying trapezium?”
“Dad you tell worse jokes than any of my friends telling bad jokes.”
Was worth every second.
BTW he passed the test, but did not ace it.
2. My wife, my daughter and I were driving her to school. We were travelling through some bush and that prompted a conversation on bush craft, and how Dad (me) was terrible at bush craft. I said yes, I am terrible at bush craft but your mother was great at it, so great that she new the names of trees. Without thinking my wife said “Yes I do….That’s Fred, the one next to it is John, Just past that is Roger….” Daughter and I cracked up.
3. A great way to annoy your son during a game of Uno. Any time it was his turn to play I said “pick up two, Thomas” ANY TIME. The first and second time he’d stop to look at the cards. After that he got very annoyed and sometimes got quite flustered. The payoff came several times during the evening. I had got the right card and said “Now I can quite legitimately say “pick up two, Thomas” before playing the card. One other family member played the card against me and I got in “Now it’s my turn to pick up Two” But the biggest payoff was the laughs at the constant repetition. Best. Game. Of Uno. Ever
The Errorist Manifesto 